May 2010
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Do one thing a day that scares you.
(via 472239364)
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i really don't need to be protected. i can defend myself!
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Sometimes Words Help People
- Person 1: Things will be okay. I know it feels like your heart is being torn out right now but I promise things will get better. If she is going to treat you like this, she doesn't fucking deserve you.
- Person 2: Yeah, but I want her to. I want her to be strong enough to fight for this because it's a bullshit reason to throw us away.
- Person 1: I agree. I agree completely.
- Person 2: But I know that she won't. I know she doesn't see us as something she wants. And I don't understand that! I would pull away and she would pull me closer, but now she's ready to push me far away?!
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I'll have to walk a thousand miles just to find the ground deserving of your feet. You could throw me down and walk on me and I'd just look on through my love and through the haze.
(via jessebarrera)
Irony
I always thought that I would be the first to run from a relationship. I never fully believed that I was capable of being in one until last Wednesday. I told myself, “I’ll send this message that asks if —————— wants to go out with me, and if —————— says, ‘Yes,’ I’ll give it a shot!”
Things seemed marvelous! Late night conversations brought more happiness and joy than I had felt in a really long time. Everything just seemed right.
Fast-forwarding a week—it’s not the same. We lost it but, then again, I have to ask myself if we ever really had it to begin with. I want to make this work! I don’t believe in just dropping things and saying, “Oh, what’s done is done, and this is over.”
Once again I’m putting someone’s happiness before my own. Once again I am willing to take the blame. I care that bloody much! It annoys me!!
Everyone becomes fearful of being in a relationship. Everyone begins to think, “Oh crap! I’m falling too far too quickly! I don’t want to be trapped!” Most people try to work through that, though. They may think that it means their heart wants something different for them, but that’s a load of bosh. Your heart wants what you tell it to. If you want to work at something, your heart will realize that and change.
I now have to program my heart to not feel for you. I now have to program my brain to forget those memories of us. Those memories of you.
The sound. The smell. The taste. The sight. The touch.
I mustn’t be reminded of those things.
How do you do it, ——————? How do you so easily say, “It’s not what I want,” and forget everything? Did you forget? Does it haunt your dreams to a certain extent? Before you sleep at night, do you think of that one night we shared?
Your face is imprinted on my eyelids, hence the reason I am not sleeping tonight.
I can’t help but feel betrayed. I can’t help but feel used. ——————, was that all that I was good for? One date? One night? One morning?
G-d, I hope not. I hope that you sincerely felt something at some point. Seriously.
“You will lose someone you can’t live without, and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is that you never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also the good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn’t seal back up. And you come through. It’s like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly —- that still hurts when the weather gets cold, but you learn to dance with the limp.”
—Anne Lamott (via 472239364)
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♀: Nicest Thing →
ohcardigan.tumblr.com
I wish I was your favorite girl
I wish you thought I was the reason you are in the world
I wish my smile was your favorite kind of smile
I wish the way that I dressed was your favourite kind of style
I wish you’d hold my hand when I was upset
I wish you’d never forget the look on my face when we first met
I wish that without me your heart would break
I wish that without me you’d be spending the rest of your nights awake
I wish that without me you couldn’t eat
I wish I was the last thing on your mind before you went to sleep
Look, all I know is that you’re the nicest thing I’ve ever seen
And I wish that we could see if we could be something
Basically.
i don’t want your marks to fade…
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Were so close
Mae
I feel like this is appropriate for the moment.
it’s that time of the year. spring semester is coming to an end. everyone is frantically studying for the finals they have this week. people are packing the belongings that fill their dorms and campus apartments.
and what am i doing?
other than working at wal-mart, i spend my days playing video games or watching dvds. i rarely write anymore; i’m saddened by this.
i wish that i lived the life of a student. i miss my dorm room. i miss classes. i miss walking across campus every day. having a meal plan is far better than having to find some way to pay for food or other expenses.
it’s far better than being thrown head-first into the working world.
i understand this now.
